Sparda Sisters
by Birds of North Pole
Summary: Dante and Vergil were changed into women overnight, Mundus disappeared off the face of the Earth and... Limbo fears the feminine side of Dante...? Plot bunny that I decided to continue. Rated M just for safety. Loosely based rewrite for the second part of the DmC 5 game. Yuri, yaoi, little het. Nothing graphic
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Devil May Cry.

Author's Notes: Alright! Second try at this shit! [inhales deeply]

I really don't know why I'm doing this. But the thought just keeps popping up in front of all other thoughts: write this fic, write this fic...

It's for my peace (piece?) of mind too so I don't snap at people when Monday comes from lack of sleep up all night thinking about it.

So Dante and Vergil had escaped Mudus's batman 'you-don't-fuck-with-a-god' beam of death with suicidal (homicidal to the terrorist level in peacetime) Nascar driving techniques. Then the overlord goes missing, and the nephilims found themselves turned into women.

Some OOC-ness involved, but I blame it on Dante and Vergil's new gender and sudden hormone change.

I hate to that Vergil became Dante's biggest boss again. Whyyy does he always have to turn to the dark side... ? %^%

Enjoy.

_Italic paragraphs are flashbacks._

* * *

Kat's bra size were B-34, but they were pretty tight on his chest. So his measure must be something close to that.

Dante looked at the numbers drawn on his lightly tanned forearm and scowled at the smiling faces on strange shaped underwear beside him. Woman can take a helluva more humiliation and endure discomfort longer than he ever could. He was rather impressed by the strippers in Lilith's club now; able to dance in heels so tall they were practically walking on the tip of their toes and not stumble once.

Right now Dante was in a run-down ma and pa women's boutique (there were two of them on the same street, neighboring each other: one is an authentic boutique opened by an actual French that sold some pricy but fashionable clothing and one is a second hand junk store pretending to be a boutique; Dante is in the latter) for some pretty good, if strange, and not perverted at all reasons.

Why?

He's now officially a member of the female community.

Day one of his fucked-up life without a double-digit dick.

_He looked at a color changing Vergil—one can school their features, but the color of their face already betrayed them—an absolutely beautiful, natural (okay, the method they were obtained was unnatural, but they were still natural breasts) D-cups almost bursting the seams of his normally loose fitting pajamas, nothing stirring below. Vergil had, Dante could swear, slimmed down significantly from a fit man to a delicate looking woman at night. His hair grew at least several inches and now stopped at the top of his pronounced busts. His hips were little wider and back curvier, chin more pointed and features more feminine. Vergil's beautiful, not **attractive**._

_Dante eve made the point to reach for his junk, but there was nothing there._

_N-O-T-H-I-N-G. Not a fucking thing._

"Ma'am?" Someone apparently had snuck up behind him and he jumped in surprise. But he restrained the blow that he was going to deliver to the poor woman's solar plexus out of instinct. Wouldn't do to have someone killed on a supply run. "Oh, I'm sorry. Did I scare you?"

"Damn right you did, old bitch." Dante muttered under his breath grudgingly. It felt rather normal without his most precious organ—other than his heart, that is—which had startled Dante to no end because he was a man, goddamn it, he was carrying around that appendage longer than he had been without it. He have to be _disturbed_; sure, he can be resigned to his fate, but to resign you have to be _terrified_ first, which Dante's brain had to yet digest.

Either the woman heard the rude complain and ignored it, or she had really bad hearing, because she smiled and continued her ramble.

"What would you like? A birthday surprise for your boyfriend?" She winked, "girls like you are too embarrassed to say it out loud, but don't worry, I can read that thought off of your face."

What? Shit no. He is straight as a flag pole, end of discussion.

You do have some horrible people reading skills, lady. No wonder this place is a run-down shit hole.

"Uh, no." I'm looking for bras for my brother because he's now a D-cupped woman without any clothes from me or another girl that would actually fit his busty chest, if you would so helpfully look for bras like that instead of bothering me would really be appreciated.

Oh, by the way, if you are wondering, we are nephilims, so we fucking change into women. No kidding.

_Vergil took the situation with so much Zen that Dante can't even imagine. First analyzing it, okay, he was turned female, the transformation was overnight, he didn't feel a thing. Either there was sedatives involved, which was near impossible because he set alarms and himself was a very light sleeper, or that it included spells of some kind. Which is a little childish. Maybe it's something that had to do with their odd heritage._

_He then__ viewed all his choices that are logical, that leaves only one._

_It have something to do with nephilim blood._

_After that it was trying to find a cure for this nephilim transformation, apparently even Vergil's vast knowledgeable variety of old, dusty Latin books didn't have anything like it recorded. So__ that went well._

_Phineas the demon would be very helpful right about now._

"No?" She looked genuinely surprised by the answer before that cosmetic-level fake Mother Teresa smile was plastered back on to her face. "Well, how else can I help you then?"

He wanted to tell the woman to fuck off, but he really don't know how to measure woman's cup size and he might buy something too big for him and too small for Vergil's, you know. Kat's out of commission, humans need some recovery time despite her constant protests that she was fine. She's been tortured after all, and it's not called 'torture' for nothing. So before she could argue him out of his not-sensible logic he barged out of the door. So now his only viable choice was to work with an actual human female.

It's all fun and games.

"Do you have any bras that fit for, uh." Dante cupped his hands out at the air in front of his chest around where Vergil's breasts probably have been. "That, sized, like, D-something...?"

Embarrassing...

Dante thought the woman didn't get it until her mouth went 'o' in understanding with some probably sick explanation that was perfectly fine in woman sense. Dante really can't imagine it, and he really don't want to right now. All he wanted to do was to get the hell out of this horrifying store.

He'll take his chances with a cussing, sobbing, mood-swinging Limbo any day over this shit. Vergil, whenever getting some fitting clothes, is doing this next time.

In fact, he doesn't even want a next time.

"That's a lot of plastic." Dante caught the phrase she mumbled under her breath as Fake Teresa turned signaled him to follow her.

How right he was.

She dodged through crowded rows of female under garments and occasionally sighted through the isles like an animal walking in its natural environment. Which was a simile that Dante found very disturbing.

"Alright, here's the D-cup section." She pointed at a rack with three layers full of colorful bras were knotted into one big pile.

He really didn't want to pick through the haphazardly tangled wears and see which one would fit Vergil, seriously, that's just weird and totally perverted since he's still a man. At heart.

So Dante closed his eyes and picked up one sitting on the top of all the other intricately tied together ones.

He opened one of his eye to stuy it; the size looked big enough, but the top half of the bra was all transparent light blue lace—Vergil's color, funny enough—while the bottom half was a solid white.

Dante was suddenly torn between buying this for Vergil and setting it down to pick another more decently unexposed one.

So he looked warily back at the big pile of knotted undergarments. He should have no problems at all—he's picked up plenty of them in his life, including untangling his twin guns from a pink one dangling on a loose Ferris wheel— but some thing close to repulsiveness radiated from that pile whenever he braved himself to untangle another pair of bra. What's wrong with him, or the pile?

Dante can't figure it out, so he reached for the mess again and Dante could _swear_ that the whole pile _twitched_ like a mutated alien from some porno sci-fi movie. He quickly retracted his hand in horror.

Nope, Vergil, you just have to deal with it then. Dante threw the dangerously indecent piece of clothing in his shopping cart with a sigh.

He also wandered the woman's clothes section to pick up a black coat embedded with sliver vines, which was on the list of thing he needed to buy for his brother written by Vergil himself in mechanical cursive, few loose shirts in some random, not neon cool colors, purple and blue pinstriped pants—he's seen his brother wear those, and they probably don't fit him anymore—and a pair of woman's boots for his brother.

The men's shoes did not fit them anymore by a startling amount of space, and Dante didn't see himself doing combos with his shoes slipping off every other step. Vergil would probably think the same thing. Dante also does not see his fashionable brother in running shoes, so he bought a pair of jet-black leather boots that reached the ankle.

He had better luck buying himself two pairs of bando styled bra that's in gray and red— really he just picked that that pack of two up because on the label it said B thirty something and he can't keep wearing Kat's spare one because he's certain this is temporary and his male genitals would grow back eventually— some more not neon colored tank tops and earth brown combat boots. He's keeping his own coat and pants, there's nothing wrong with them, the pants fit, and so did the coat.

In the end, he spent three dollars on the humiliating blue bra, nine for the pants, fifteen for the boots, sixty some dollars for Vergil's fucking coat, and half that much for all the articles of clothing himself. Damn, that guy's _not_ cheap, not at all.

He paid cash to the man at the register, who suddenly hid his porn —and his boner, which made Dante's nothingness down there ache for something—at the sight of customer incoming. Dante stuffed all the barely folded things in two paper bags before leaving. The door was not automatic and with his hands both occupied, Dante might have made some cracks on the glass of the door with his kick.

Ah, well, nobody stopped him from leaving.

Limbo was way better than this, at least he could fight his way out of that hell.

* * *

Speak of the Devil, and he would follow your ass until the end of the days.

Someone definitely planted that demon spotter on his route home.

Dante swore to exact vengeance on whoever did it. The '_Welcome MISS DANTE_' that Limbo shoved right in front of his face was simply heart _warming._

Now Dante just swore.

Holding his two shopping bags in one hand, he summoned his trusty sword Rebellion in the other hand and hacked away at the constantly spawning demons. He made sure that the clothes didn't get stained with the raining black goo as he performed a Prop attack followed by Raze with Osiris before switching back to Rebellion.

In the middle of a one handed Trillion Blade attack he was knocked back by a warm shockwave. Catching himself at the last moment and snatching Vergil's now flying woman's coat out of the air with his demon Ophion pull.

Like he had said, that thing was also worth more than his monthly spending on groceries and ammo combined, and that's saying something.

He growled as another bomb whistled by his ear and quickly jumped away, using the Angel Glide to gain more distance as the bomb exploded behind him, luckily also destroying the three ugly Stygians with it. Dante heard a cry that sounded very much frustrated and smirked victoriously; demons like the Shielded Bathos are just annoying at best. He used the Demon Pull to throw away that small shield of its before peppering it with bullets from Ivory only, because his other hand's too busy holding the two shopping bags and keeping them away from the constantly spurted demon blood.

He should call himself a professional multi-tasker now, juggling demon killing and shopping.

Dante was pretty smug until a Tyrant and Ravagers made themselves known with their signature chain-saw whirr and heavy pounding foot steps. Great, the unstoppable crowd is a pain in the ass. Dante hated this combination of demons, you can't beat them without the full use of both hands, feet and brain.

The last part got to him way more than the first two did.

He dodged into an alley and felt something squelchy was crushed under his foot with a loud '_splat_'; he looked down, it was a rat sized Critter that had it's guts spurted over the alleyway. The dim eerie lighting coming from the above wasn't helping the situation either. What's worse, the black demonic bug juice also soaked onto Kat's shoes that he had burrowed and also splattered over his jeans' legs. Now the faintest of the smirk was replaced completely by a troubled frown; he would feel pretty bad just returning Kat's shoes like this, even if demon goo was easy on the clothes—which Dante was forever grateful for, it's pretty hard to explain that you kill demons for a living to the dry cleaning store owner every day of the week, or the Goodwill store.

It doesn't help when Limbo, once again, flashed bright letters to the left of him that said '_What's wrong?_' with sarcasm so thick that Dante could smell it in the air even if the city was just a bunch of bricks and metal that short of warped into demonic bricks and metal.

He should change his clothes before he get back to Vergil and stop at the dry cleaning again. Dante kicked himself mentally for not buying that extra pair of jeans in the junk store ran by Fake Teresa and Porn Jacker. So what the hell, might as well as change here, its as good as a public bathroom and better, because Dante really didn't want to go into the girl's bathroom.

It's embarrassing, weird, and pride damaging.

"Hey Limbo, don't look." Dante didn't wait for the graffiti styled reply from the city before setting down the paper bags at somewhere relatively clean and took off his coat.

'_What the Hell?'_ the letters on the ground dissipated as soon as it came. '_Dante, stop it!'_

Huh, curioser and curioser. Dante felt like it was time to exact some revenge against the city that worked against him on everything...

"Make me." Dante laughed evilly as he pulled up his light grey tank top with the coat draped over one arm. His new found breasts might have juggled a little when the skin tight top was pulled off. But hey, it's better than Vergil's D's, which was extremely animated and exaggerated his slightest movements.

Dante wondered idly if Limbo had a gender... Hmm, can a city spawn more little cities? Little Limbos?

'A_rgh!' _Limbo exclaimed before Dante found the alleyway darken and eyes peeked out from every shadow.

He took a step back at the hungry glint in the glittering eyes before he realized that he could no longer hear the approaching saw, because demons don't go 'poof' until Dante killed them, and they sure as heck don't want to do that job themselves.

So, conclusion: he's back in the real world. Limbo the bitch spit him out or something like it. Dante had found a new, quicker way to get out of chaos, but it did severely wound his male(/female) pride. Dante wondered if the bouncing-like-Jell-O tendency of female breasts did it for Limbo, so he glared at his new-found breasts. He looked gorgeous, really, and he think he's hot himself. Dante could almost hear Vergil tsk-ing at him—really, he think Vergil is probably the only person in real life who makes that old archaic sound in disappointment, just how old is he?— and saying 'hubris, brother', but hey, he really _is _hot, Vergil's just jealous.

"My boobs don't look that bad do they?" Dante asked the homeless, who were staring at him with lust in their eyes like this was once in a lifetime eye candy. They shook their heads with their eyes still locked onto the twins.

See, even the homeless says 'no'.

Dante thinks that his standards might have been going down since he met that first fucker who had a face equipped with a pussy in Limbo. What was his name? Henry? Hun? Dante was lost in thought as he picked up the now battered shopping bags. But a black stain caught his eye (a large splotch, really, Dante's too proud to admit his obviousness to unusual colors. The problem had made itself known after fight Bob Barbas). So he lifted Vergil's slightly ruffled coat out of the paper bag to inspect closely under the light, or the lack of any.

He cursed again, more severely than the last time; because there was demon blood soaked through the coat despite him taking a great amount of care not to spill anything on it.

Damn Limbo.

* * *

Reviews and favorites appreciated/loved! Yep, only been in America for three years, learned English from scratch (horrible grammar).


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Devil May Cry is totally not mine.

Author's Notes:

Kat's plan and some of the conversation in that time frame are directly drawn from the gameplay. I'm not counting enemies and just giving the partially accurate information on important parts (it's too much research, because I had to go through the whole mission four times to catch all the dialogue and die at least twice at the smurf drag queen that I failed to recall a name for) like when you encounter a new one or a semi-boss fight ensues.

In my version everything happens the next day. I have no idea what timeline it was game-wise. Next week? Right after they rescued and patched Kat up?

Dante still acknowledges himself as a 'he', so, yeah, _he_ is a woman. Same goes with Vergil.

I really can't help the OOC-ness, I simply don't understand American humor, snarky, laid back logic that Dante empolyed, and the tendency to refer to some famous stuff and shit I never even glance at (Miley Cyrus, for example, or Kim Kardashian). Forgive me for my ignorance, I'm not exactly social or interested in gossip.

(stuff in quotes are commentary and/or filling in on the background)

Enjoy.

* * *

He slipped into a new woman's sleeveless top, moderately good mood now completely fowled by the recent events and the practically drooling men around him. This one shirt had a dark gothic skull printed over the left top corner of the light cream fabric with a unbelievably cute aura instead of the cool or punk-like Dante had hoped for when he bough it. Well, it's woman's clothing; he get what he asked for.

Dante slung his heavy coat over his shoulders with practiced ease before slipping into the actual sleeves of the windbreaker. He also took off Kat's soiled running shoes and replaced them with his new (if not, a little shiny) combat boots; he stuffed the borrowed pair into one of the two stained bags. Next stop is definitely laundry store.

* * *

Dante's phone rang while he examined his new cream-colored breasts from a true woman's view sitting on a fugly colored plastic lawn chair that the laundry shop oh so graciously provided; hey, it's interesting to look down at the twins. He was determined to make the most out of this situation while he could. And this is totally not perverted, nor strange.

Uh.

Ahem.

As he was saying.

So he stood up with reluctance to some degree and pulled out his phone from where it had been deeply tucked in his back pocket just as his washer decided to drain all the water in the machine with a long wet gurgle and began the drying process.

"Yeah Verge?" He's begin to love this new nickname for his long lost and recently found twin, it's easier to say, less archaic—well, it makes Vergil a little less old-man-in-hunnerds and more balding-fifty-year-old-with-beer-belly, which the actual Vergil does not have, maybe he really would look like that when they grow old, _if_ they ever—and a bit cool; though it's neither as awesome, cool nor stylish as his own name. Since Vergil is the only one who actually have his phone number and persistently call it, Dante could conclude that: the phone call is from Vergil (no shit, Sherlock), that this is important, because Vergil also almost never calls for groceries.

"Where are you as of right now?" Vergil asked with his new feminine voice, which for a moment there Dante's brain (consists of two cells, surprisingly) didn't register and recognize and induced a moment of panic before also calming down and thinking about the situation at hands.

His brother sounded like Kat, yet he didn't exactly sound like Kat; it had more of a low purr in the underlying sounds of the voice and lacking in the softness that made Kat's voice gentle. Vergil's voice was more like a sound from a woman that had earned a respectful place among a job dominated by men, which, if one thinks hard about, does kind of include saving the day.

"In a laundry place."

"Are you near a grocery store?" Well, guess what? That hit spot-on.

"Yeah, why?" Dante still asked anyways.

"This is going to be awkward." Vergil coughed into the phone.

"Spill it then. You know I would help anyway I can."

Silence stretched on on the other side of the line, and Dante patiently waited for Vergil to give him the shopping list. Now he thought about it, whatever had embarrassed Vergil a great deal in just saying the words was most likely going to happen to his twin too, because that was the telepathic rule that applied to twins, triplets, quads, penta- pantalets? Pen-?... skipping to octuplets.

Dante's seventh sense—he got his sixth sense from his Dad long ago— was telling him that Vergil's news was not good, but he couldn't do a thing to stop whatever Vergil's going to say, other than disconnecting, that is, but it really won't do him any good except for being ambushed by whatever the hell Vergil was going to warn him.

"Can you go pick up..." Vergil drawled, "you know? _Stuff?_"

What the hell is Vergil talking about? And what's with the new attitude?

Dante said exactly what he thought. The first part of it, anyways.

"Feminine products, Dante." Vergil explained with a blush that was clearly audible over the phone.

"For Kat?" Well, what's so embarrassing about that? He's glad to help, Kat's she had braved through some shit that normal people can't go through, it's only right if he can help back through this particularly stinking pile of steaming shit that was dropped on them Pearl Harbor-style.

"Unfortunately... No." Vergil finally found the guts to say it out loud. "I just found a new, _interesting_ fact about this spell. It apparently also changes our anatomy as much as out physique."

Huh? Still, what _is_ his brother talking about? And what the hell is he planning on doing with the 'feminine product' if Kat, the only lady, isn't going to use it?

Vergil could probably pick up the confusion from the other side of the phone, and he had sighed in exasperation before stating flat out, "I'm on my period, Dante. So could you possibly help me to pick up some products necessary for dealing with the end of the menstrual cycle?"

"Wait, so we are really woman?" He might need a moment to digest what he's hearing. "Like, getting laid with a guy would get me knocked up and everything?"

"For your first question, I thought we got past that stage already, Dante. But to answer your second question, yes, apparently we are fertile, as a female."

Hmm.

You do discover something new each day. Though most people's daily discovery about self and world are usually not this tremendous or shocking; they're more like how to shut a Chihuahua up by snarling at it or some mildly weird-assed stuff.

Well, Dante, careful who you sleep with.

It's not like he'll try to sleep with a man anyways, that's just too gay for himself, mentally.

"Okay. So... Let's see, you want me to pick up maxi pads?" Dante might have asked a little more brashly and louder than he should have.

"_Dante!_" Vergil hissed in surprise and shame, "there are people around you!"

"Sorry." Dante apologized sheepishly to his brother. Bystanders. Right, he might have forgotten about that. So he sent a withering glare at whoever dared to stare at him weirdly for too long to make up for the permanent mental damage done by overhearing the entire conversation in a completely unconvincing way. Gladly, the washer groaned once before shutting down —apparently giving out from old age or finished it's impossibly difficult task— at the perfect moment. But Dante, again, had to get his butt up from his comfortable lounge on a plastic chair and go get his now partially dried clothing.

"Kay, I'm going to the grocery store next door now. Anything else, Verge?"

"Yeah, such as thinking of a pet name for you, it's only fair, _Dante_."

"No thanks, I prefer my name this way, Verge." Dante grinned unconsciously, mental note to self; use the nickname Verge as much as he could without seeming conspicuous to his brother. "Don't need to waste your superior brain power on something like that."

He stuffed the poor clothes into fresh bags without even trying to fold them and hung up on his brother before Vergil could think of something witty to reply at him. Dante might have chuckled to himself a little as he slammed the antique washing machine shut once again.

Good times.

* * *

He arrived at their underground lair— it kinda reminded him of one, so he's going to go ahead and call it one even if it wasn't underground at all— fifteen minutes later, a bag in each hand that had the brand of the also ma and pa store printed over. However, he could not find Vergil anywhere, so he sat the bags down at their rather decent counter and looked around lazily in search for something to pass the boredom until his often fashionably late brother decides to show his face. Vergil's always busy with something unbelievably geeky anyways.

Dante had no idea how does one be old fashion _and_ modernized at the same time, well, not until he met Vergil. A modern samurai Vergil was, and Dante, as much as he finds an katana wielding Blackberry user funny, he can't find anything contradicting or illogical in what elements Vergil hand mixed together in his life. Sword art, hacking into computers, meditation—he does that every fucking day and says that's his way of coping with Dante's immaturity while Dante can't see how sitting like a stone not grind against one's nerves— and sending out videos to the demonized government as a supposed terrorist.

"Hey Dante." He snapped out of his thoughts to see a still bruised Kat peering at him from her seat at the threshold of the garage doors. Shit, how long have she been sitting there watching him? Kat only smiled at him and winced as she got up. Dante might have panicked a little at that.

"Whoa, slow down, Kat." Dante rushed toward her, "you should still be in bed!"

"I couldn't just lay there. Had to do something to help this upcoming mission."

"You've done enough already." Dante scolded her.

"No, I know the layout of the tower." Kat looked up at him with that determined little sister look that Dante just couldn't say 'no' to no matter how ridiculous the reason for that look was. "I can help you."

"At least we can do it while you lay in bed and rest up."

"Dante. She needed to get up and move a little." Vergil defended Kat, who had a slightly grateful and mostly smug look on her face.

"She's wounded!"

"I'm not some porcelain doll. I can manage."

"Kat,-"

"Treating people like you want to be treated." Vergil interjected. "I'm sure you wouldn't lay in bed all day if you can move."

Dante shuddered, because peacefulness and Dante just don't mix well when together. He had to break something, or do something absolutely breaking the proverbial laws. But Kat was human, above all, she can't take hits as well and as much as Dante and Vergil could. Without demonic accelerated healing, it's harder to cope with the pain and all. Just when Dante opened his mouth to argue the point with his brother, Kat quickly changed the subject.

"Did you get all the things we needed, Dante?"

Vergil also suddenly looked at him expectantly with that eyebrow arched in question. His gaze wandered from his brother's softened face to his loose garments. The pants barely stayed on his new slimmed waist while the shirt did exactly the opposite of that. His brother didn't bother to bottom the shirt up and just left half of the full breasts exposed in the light; since Vergil probably was unable to do so with the men's shirt anyways. The pale porcelain skin of his brother's was even a little waxy under the yellow lightings and the thick layer of dust in the place. Dante was shameless in measuring up his brother's body, because they're guys, and guys don't care about that.

"Did you, brother?" Vergil gave him an inquisitive look.

Despite Dante's reluctance to let Kat's injuries slide, he had grudgingly drew out the bra and threw it at Vergil, who caught every single thing with ease, the bra included. Though he frowned at the bra's over-exposed design and gave Dante a exasperated look like he was some immature joker. Kat had to suppress some laughter and turned her head away so that the brothers won't see it.

"You just had to do it, didn't you?" Vergil sighed and gave him the parental look.

"What?" Dante glanced at the thin laced article of clothing, "the bra? It was the lesser evil of the two."

"What evil- do I want to know what you're talking about?"

"Probably not." Dante shrugged impassively and tossed some more clothes to Vergil— another questioning brow was raised at the pinstripes, and Dante scowled at his brother— including the sixty dollar worth of coat, which he had made sure Vergil knew. His brother responded with a clipped but amused laugh at his insistence to take care of the coat because that was more than his monthly spending. Vergil only told Kat to turn around when he changed from his pajamas (despite Vergil's protest that it was just sleeping clothes Dante still called it PJ's) to the woman's clothing. But he didn't take off the briefs he had on when he slipped into the pants.

Vergil got dressed quickly, flinging his new coat over his bright aqua shirt and looked at Dante, again, with that expectant look in his eyes.

He rolled his eyes and tossed the other, untouched bag to Vergil. Who, luckily, had the decency to go to the nearest bathroom available to put where ever the fuck you put a sanitary napkin. Dante, frankly, dreaded the same thing happening to him too... He cut off that train of thought and directed his full attention on Kat.

"Are you sure-"

Kat quickly cut him off with an assurance, "Don't worry, Dante, I'm fine."

Dante glanced worriedly at the makeshift sling Kat had over one shoulder.

"It looks worse than it is." Kat dismissed the thought before it have even reached Dante's mouth. Dante sighed and fell silent, she was persistent and stubborn.

When his brother emerged from the bathroom again Kat cleared her throat to get their attentions. She walked over and picked up a half-used piece of chalk she had probably already prepared. In the dark lightings of the hideout, Kat kneeled down to eye level with the board to show the plan to ambush Mundus. Dante kneeled behind her while Vergil watched from a high perch above, Yamato now in his hand again and used like a walking cane—just how old is he to need a cane at all in the first place? But Dante brushed that off for later examination and poking fun at.

This is show time.

* * *

*Third person omniscient (ish)*

"S_o the Hell Gate is the main source of Mundus's power. It can only be reached from his chamber..." Kat drew a small rectangle and labeled it 'destroy hellgate' right above a bigger square before putting a arrow in it._

_"You must break into the chamber to close the Hell Gate." She turned to look at Dante straight in the eyes, Dante felt his heart pang at the look Kat was giving him the first time since they made their escape. Okay, even if life and the human race in general have been a bitch and a half to him, Dante would do this for revenge of torturing Kat, a girl who Dante had thought of as his little sister now. So he nodded to show that he was listening, and Kat continued._

_"Mudus is still weak from his last outburst. This is your chance to defeat him." Kat turned back to the board, "Mundus doesn't know that Vergil is nephilim, we can use that to our advantage. There's a back door to the tower located here."_

_Kat's gaze moved to a lower part of the blue print and made a curvy arrow at a small wider-than-it's-tall door._

Vergil looked around for passing workers and civilians alike before dodging into the entrance that was only half his height. The garbage cans around the door stank of something fleshy rotting away. Hopefully it wasn't a body or anything like it. He crept on, coat tail trailing on the ground as he tried to stalk silently, the artificial material of his pants making a loud swish each time it came in contact with other parts of itself. Vergil loudly cursed in his head at Dante and his less than fashionable statements on clothing. It might just cost them their carefully constructed plan.

_"Vergil, you must reach the security room undetected so Dante, you will create a distraction, here." Kat quickly moved toward another part of the board and tapped the chalk on the spot as she addressed the twin._

He stood at the majestic front entrance of the up reaching arm like building(/s, since it does branch out into more than two in a strange Dali fashion) and waited for the security camera to zoom in on him before taunting loudly, which was his profession.

"Hey guys! You looking for a fight? Here I am!" Dante aimed a fist sized rock at the camera and threw it as hard as he could. The camera was utterly destroyed with a crackle of electricity and a shower of sparks. Then the whole behemoth of a building shook, windows cracked and exploded, steel frames were torn and bent as a demonic aura begin to gather at the middle piece of the branching tower.

"Limbo, we meet again." Dante shielded his eyes when the demonic aura shot into the sky and the two monstrous branches of the skyscraper flanking on the either side of the needle shaped center spread in a imitation of wings taking flight. Chunks of solid concrete levitated into the air as cars were flung into each other and the obstacles that now habited a purple and red sky.

_"Once Mundus sees you, all hell will break loose. Stay close to the tower entrance."_

Dante ran from one piece of debris to another, some barely big enough to walk two steps on while others are as big as the parking lot—to be honest, it _was_ the parking lot; constantly using the Orphion pull to jump from one shifting place to another and running in between, his destination crystal clear. Once he reached the entrance with a roll, Limbo shined '_surrender_' at him before

_"The gates will seal, Dante, you need to keep them busy while Vergil makes his way to the tower."_

Unperturbed by the earthquake Limbo shook up, Dante watched as purple enemies spawned from the ground. Not a sickly purple, in fact, it was a girly purple doll thingy with a giant saw looking blade in their right hand. He was pretty sure Limbo summoned them for the mocking factor despite the fact that it was losing.

Elite Stygian. Who look so much like dolls with a praying mantis limb. He could practically see Limbo wording '_LOL_' somewhere Dante can't see.

"Ha-ha, very funny." Dante muttered as he whipped out Osiris to face the crowd of purple.

After a few Karma dished out, Dante found himself with a sword in his chest and stumbling as more purple girly shits charged their giant sword. Damn it. He was too busy cropping at the Elites—he should name that move, 'keep enemies closer', maybe?— to notice the Witch in the back of the mix. He cursed when the Stygian he had beat half to death became enveloped in a bubble of blue light; he could swear that it looked smug when the shield was cast upon it. Dante simply cracked open the magical defense with a few strokes from Osiris and continued his aerial combos switching to Rebellion.

A unearthly drowned-person yell resonated from the back, yep, the Witch cooking up another one of those lava and hellfire swords with a cry that disturbingly resembled to woman giving birth. He finished his savage assault on the purple doll and pulled himself closer to the female looking demon with angel mode of Orphion. The Witch teleported a few feet away, shield once again up, that was enough to disrupt the hacking that Dante was in the process of giving to the bitch.

He scowled in annoyance, stupid demons.

He summoned Aquila and threw it at the Witch, Round Trip dealt with the shield and the already weakened demon inside. Dante felt the slight satisfaction at the sight of a exploding goo filled demon that put a sword _in_ him. No one's going to put something in him without consent and get away with no consequences.

*Boop. Scene shift.*

Vergil jogged toward the laptop already set up and running like it was meant for him. The thought had his heart jumping but nothing came out to ambush him. He paused in front of the computer bending down to catch a breath. His new-found breasts might not weigh much simply carrying it as part of his whole body weight and walking about; but when running a marathon worth of distance the weight became unbearable. He's not one to curse at anything much (Dante's an exception and categorized as a creature of his own and doesn't belong in general 'anything'), but he was going to hex the hell out of whoever decided that it was funny to put a spell on them (that would be me, but of course there's no breaking fourth walls here, so it's going to remain mysterious throughout the story, no one's taking my credit).

Focusing on the more important task at hand, Vergil popped his neck and begin typing into commands until a red box 'Security Override' flashed in his eyes. Part one accomplished.

*Boop. Scene shift.*

'_Stop him.'_ Limbo commanded as demons spawned from the ground.

_"Dante. Make a break for the main entrance before it seals itself shut. You'll have a few seconds at best."_

Dante ignored the menacing demons who charged at him and aimed for the gate. Stomping up the stairs he swiped at demons who threatened to get in his way. He slid into the main building just as the black crystalloid grew from the ground and clogged the door. That was _close_. Dante let out a small breath at the relief before straightening up and got ready.

_"Once inside, you face Mundus's elite guard. Take him out quickly."_

A Dreamrunner made it's epic and flashy entrance with some skills whipping that shiny twin blades of his around; and by the way that damn Hawaiian straw skirt wearing pervert was wolf-whistling at him, Dante was pretty sure that he wanted to kill it as fast and painful as he could manage without Kat telling him to do so. The creature teleported through a bubble of mirror like reflective hole before rushing out right at him. Dante evaded perfectly and placed a well timed Arbiter hit right up the demon's ass.

"Eat that, you little fuck." Dante rushed to deliver three more blows with Rebellion before the demon—a full torso higher than him despite what he said— jumped away. Dante switched to Revenant, which definitely had Vergil's color influence by the look of the light blue gleaming barrel and alabaster handle, and filled the Dreamrunner with (pretty magical) lead and gun powder—even Verge's gun is so old fashioned—at close range. The demon just swapped at the air, and the bullets bounced off it's original course and bounded harmlessly on the floor.

That guy can block bullets! Block bullets when Dante failed to dodge a Batho's fireball grenade with ease and style!

Apparently the Avatar was impressed by himself also, because he jutted his chin toward Dante in a proud and flirting fashion in a pose with his hands behind his back. Blocking shots from Ebony and Ivory that should have made his privates into Swiss cheese, the demon teleported again; this time, Dante was ready. He drop-and-rolled as the dual sword wielding demon came out of the portal in what can be best described as a tumbling technique. Taking the moment that the Dreamrunner paused for collection and probably to banish the dizziness, Dante used Demon Orphoin Pull to grab the demon but just in time for three hits from Rebellion before he found himself on the ground and the demon with his big hands still grasping Dante's ankles, by the look on the demon's face, he was considering either groping Dante or killing him.

Dante pushed himself up and gave the demon one heck of an ugly slash across the face with his trusty sword. The smurf/org thing took a step back in shock while holding his face with one hand, then he glowered at Dante like he wanted to skin him, more than he had anyways.

"Hey, mixed signals there, you old perv." Dante threw an also flirting wink at the mutated smurf in mockery before executing a Tremor toward the Dreamrunner. This time the blow caught the demon, Dante pulled himself toward the demon and killed the horny demon with Judgment from Arbiter.

'_Cannot hide.'_ Limbo exclaimed angrily upon the death of Hawaiian Avatar. Dante ignored the pissed off Limbo and ran.

_"Vergil will knock out the internal camera system — Mundus won't be able to see where you are."_

*Boop. Scene switch.*

Vergil was working on the system and it was giving him a run for his money— even if he didn't get paid a cent for what he was doing the idiom was still true, demons like Mundus had great technology at their disperse. Hopefully his dear brother was doing better than he was, because he was a bit stuck.

If he haven't met Dante yet, he probably would have wanted to pull at his hair, but Dante had significantly built his tolerance for irritation, so he remained calm and continued to manipulate the system. It was like a stubborn Dante who refused to do what he should have done, such as picking up after himself, though Vergil was a bit appalled at the analogy, but it was the closest thing that Vergil could think of.

Finally!

Vergil looked down at his handiwork with pride and at a computer that he had already doubled 'affectionately' (sans the actual love) as Little Dante.

Watch out, Mundus.

* * *

Long chapter. Reviews and favorites appreciated!


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